Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Life is Therapy--Sometimes You Have to Stop & Reflect on Where You've Been

New to the Life is Therapy series? Here's a quick blurb to tell you what it's about:

Sometimes we parents can get bogged down in the notion that the teaching of our children must be done by professionals. Parents of children with special needs are particularly vulnerable to this idea since children with special needs often have to learn and develop quite differently than children with typical needs. This series centers around the idea that learning can and does occur most effectively through everyday life experiences at home and out in the community--for children with both typical and special needs.

Last week, we talked about entering your child's world. I showed a video of me trying to direct Jack's play with complete disregard for what he was doing at the moment. He ignored me. Then I decided to sing about what he was doing and we enjoyed a short interaction. You can see that post here.

That was the original beginning of this blog post and I was going to go into more detail about matching your child but I'm going to save that for next week now. This post is late getting out. Jack's been home sick from school and I have had a very busy couple of days at work. Jack seems to be getting over his pink eye and ear infection very quickly but tonight has been a rough one so far. He has thrown up into his mask already and I've already had to clean out his mask again because he's had so many secretions. Nights like these it's easy to get a little down.

But that's when I think back to days like these. Looking back, I don't know how any of us made it through that very trying period with so little restful sleep.

And I remember the gratefulness I felt in this post. Back then I was excited to see him carry little plastic balls in his hands. These days he walks around everywhere with a big green basketball.

Tonight he told me "Jack shoes off in house. Go away." because he did not want to wear the house shoes that I was trying to get on him.

When I came home today, I said, "Ah, I missed you." and Jack said "I miss you!" How very sweet. He is blossoming before my eyes.

Yes, some nights are a little rough but overall Jack is developing by leaps and bounds.

So, on those days, when you find yourself wondering if your kiddo will ever learn anything you are trying to teach him/her, take a step back and look at where you've been. It's very therapeutic for moms and dads. Life is Therapy for us too!

Other Life is Therapy Posts can be found at:
Introductory Post
Prepositions at the Park
Rainy Days
Getting Your Child's Attention

Feel free to share your thoughts. How do you perk yourself up on those tough days?

Now it's your turn to participate. This is where we share our ideas and stories with one another. We're all in this together. Let's laugh together, motivate one another, and stimulate each others ideas. If you have a blog, create your own "life is therapy" post and link to the specific post in the Mr. Linky below. If you don't have a blog just leave a comment with your life is therapy story.


Melissa aka Equidae said...

you are right .... looking back it gives us hope, insight and therapy :)

Rachel said...

Wow. That's an amazing perspective, Marie! You're so mature - you amaze me!

You're right - that's the only way to handle tough days - taking a step back and looking at the big picture. Something that is very hard for me to do in the moment.

Thanks for the encouragement!

Michelle said...

I hope it's ok that I linked up an older post - the one with the kids playing in the leaves :)
I'm going to try and remember to do this more often - the Life Is Therapy posts - I think it's a great idea!

Marie said...

Great link, Michelle!

Anonymous said...

There are definitely times when I know where my little one got her impatience from! You are correct. It is important to look back every once in a while and see what you have all accomplished. Right now I am also finding it important to look back since I seem to hit the same emotional roadblocks again and again.

My daughter is moving really fast right now. After months of glacial progress, she's become a river! I realized that my ARM is out of date and I think I am lowballing her on my expectations right now. I started thinking about Waiting and realized that I need to start waiting for two words or a short phrase instead of jumping on one. Once I had this realization, I had the same knee jerk reaction I had when I went from waiting for a gesture/sound/approximation/better approx or word, I get scared! Scared that I am going to damage our communication if I don't jump right away as she now expects me to. Scared that somehow, she'll pull away. Looking back has been theraputic as I am realizing that my fears were there each time but that the outcome I feared never happened. Yeah, she's gotten a bit fiesty that mama wants more but then she's learned to do more/say more. -Karena

Marie said...

Karena, thanks for sharing that. You are right. She will progress. Waiting is so hard to do when you wait so long for words to begin and you work so hard to get them. :) You've built a relationship with her, a partnership. Waiting and allowing her to progress is not going to take that away!

Doc said...

Found your blog from Jennifer. I am reading yours now and learning about Aperts. Keep the faith!